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This blog is all about all the things that make me up. I am a Mother, I am a Pagan Witch, I am a Wife, I am a homemaker, I am a student, I am Spiritual, I am a Teacher, I am Liberal Hippie, I am a Voter, and I am extremely opinionated! Plan to see it all! If you don't like what you see, feel free to leave! However, chances are, if you stick around, you'll find more to love than hate!


Thursday, July 10, 2014

Responses to Some Comments on Same Sex Marriage

I am a member of YouGov.org, a research and consulting organization.  Mostly it's a site where people can express their opinions on things, take research polls and so on... Nothing special.  But I like it.  It gives me a small glimpse into the real state of our country - what do people really think.  I guess I've been feeling a little jaded lately from isolating myself within the Pagan and Green communities.  So this site, I suppose, is my way of staying "level" in how I see things.  And more often than not, I find myself rather disgusted by what I read...

As with any site of this type there are sections for all (or nearly all) of the hot button issues.  Gay Marriage being one of the more active ones. Unfortunately the site limits comments to just 500 characters, so I had to keep my response to the issue short and sweet.  Although I could, and have, written at length on this issue, I chose instead to simply comment on the invalidity of religious arguments against Equal Marriage Rights. My comment read as follows:
If your objection against same-sex marriage is religiously based, then you should also argue against marriages of mixed faiths, mixed races and anyone who has a civil marriage too. If you aren't, then your argument is invalid. Marriage takes many forms, and no one is trying to force religious groups to accept anything they don't already. But civil marriage (which there are THOUSANDS of every year) do not involve religion, so the laws that rule them shouldn't either.
So far, 7 people have now "counter-commented" on this and I have to say, while I'm not surprised at the amount of people who are jumping all over me with "God made Adam & Eve" comments, some of the other arguments (although I've heard them before) kinda still blow my mind.

Here are a few of them:
From Member 38708: "Bigamy and polygamy will become legal as we redefine marriage."
From Member 44969: " Mixed race and homosexual are the same? You are irrational and therefore unworthy of a conversation."
From Member 289665: " it goes AGAINST Nature! wrong all around."
I've heard them all over and over... But I would like to address them, since for whatever reason the site itself doesn't allow me to comment on comments which are made on my comment...

So lets take Member 38708 first... Bigamy and Polygamy.  First, for those who don't know, there is a difference.  Bigamy is the practice of having more than one wife (or family) who are separate from one another.  For example having one wife in one state and a second in another.  In these cases, it's rare that the wives or families know about one another.  Polygamy, on the other hand is the practice of having more than one wife within the same family.

In my opinion, these are two very different issues!  Polygamy, as with ALL forms of Polyamory, when practiced in proper, requires the consent of all parties involved.  Bigamy, on the other hand requires, by definition, requires deception, and a complete lack of consent.  They're very different things.

That said, as much as I don't like the idea of Bigamy, I don't think it should be illegal.  Marriage, with all it's many forms and all it's many related dramas, is a private issue. It's an issue between the individuals who choose to enter into it.  It's not something the government should be poking their nose in to.  The ONLY exception I would place on that would be abandonment.  If a spouse disappears, the other spouse should have the right to end the marriage without consent. Also where there are children involved, the abandoning spouse should be able to be held accountable for things like child support, etc.
Now, Polyamory is a whole different issue. Not only should it not be illegal, it should be acceptable.  Polyamory in all it's combinations, is the union through marriage of consenting adults.  Yes, there are those areas in the world where child marriage and Polygamy go hand in hand, but that's not what we're talking about here. We're talking about consenting adults entering into a relationship. WHY are we giving the government the power to decide which relationships are and are not worthy of legality or acceptance?

And in my opinion, that goes for Same Sex marriages too.  It's not the government's job to dictate how citizens live their personal lives, and that includes their marriages.

So, Member 38708... Your argument is that if we legalize Same Sex Marriage, Polygamy and Bigamy will be next?!?  I say good! They should be.  The government has no right to decide how I choose to live my life or who I choose to marry.

Lets move on to Member 44969. In many ways, Race and Sexuality are the same. Neither are something which an individual gets to pick or choose.  And there are religious arguments against both, which of course was what I was referring to here.

In fact, there are LESS Biblical Arguments against Same Sex Marriage than there are against Inter-Racial Marriage. However, for the most part, today even the most devote have been able to explain away the scriptures referring to race mixing. When it was the "hot button" issue however, the arguments against it were surprisingly (or maybe not so surprisingly) similar to those against Same Sex Marriage today.  It only changed after inter-racial marriage became legal and accepted within society. I suspect in another 50 years the common view on Same Sex marriage will go the same way.  So yes, they are very similar.

Finally, lets talk to our dear friend Member 289665.  This is my "favorite" argument against Same Sex ANYTHING!  It goes against nature? Who's nature? Not mine, not the nature of those who are in Same Sex relationships... And not against the nature of the nearly 9 Million other animal species, around 5500 of which are mammals just like us, on Earth.  In fact, in the big picture, humans make up less than a fraction of a percentage of the animals on the planet, let alone all the vast many types of life within "nature."  Yet we are the ONLY form of animal, let alone life form, which rejects the notion of non-heterosexuality.  In fact, if we look to nature, ALL other forms of sexuality are represented in nature, living "peacefully" with one another...  So it seems to me that what goes against nature is to reject another form of sexuality, when clearly, nature encompasses them all.

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